Meet Kevin the Rooster. Or as I call him. ******* Kevin.
Let me tell you about ******* Kevin.
First I'm gonna tell you why you need Kevin.
Have too much Natty Lite last nigh at The Pig? Well in the event you forgot to lock this mother ****** in the coop, he will be at your window at four ******* AM cockadoodledooing his ass six ways to Sunday. Now let's say you were sober and remember to shut the coop so he doesn't see sunlight? This mother ****** has an internal clock that rivals that of Mother Nature herself. Guess what. 5 am, he's singing he song of his people non ******* stop till you come and let his ass out.
******* Kevin.
Now, I'm sure if you want a rooster you got hens. That's where this mother ****** shines. We have had NO problems with predators. Zip. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Even when Kevin was a wee young lad, he would see a predatory bird, make one call, and all his bitches would be under cover. My 90lb Great Pyrenees decides he's hungry and wants to try Chicken a la fresh? Kevin will chase that dog and make him cower in a corner. Foxes and Coyotes don't stand a chance.
******* Kevin.
So, back to the hens. You need a strong Rooster full of gusto to fertilize those bitches and make you some eggs for you to incubate into chickens for yuppies to buy their 4 year old brats. Let me tell you about Kevin. This mother ****** had a three way with two of my daughters hens, Elsa and Anna. He is into some kinky ****. But not just them. He walks into the coop like "what up I'm a big ****" and all the other girls bow to him. Even Cocoa....
******* Kevin.
Now, the reasons why I want Kevin gone.
Remember what I said about 5am IF you lock him in his coop? Well the neighbors don't take too kindly to that... Especially if I forget to lock him in and he's at the neighbors window at 4:15 singing the song of his people.
The whole protective thing? Well my five ear old daughter loves to play with the hens and pick them up. Kevin is about as big as she is. And he ain't afraid of a 90lb dog with fangs, he sure ain't afraid of no little girl. She walks over to her girlies to pick them up, he is all over her like a hog on slop.
****** Kevin.
So, the skinny. You come and catch him? He's yours free and clear. Great rooster in every sense of the word. Horrible ******* pet for a family with a few acres. I gotta catch him for you? $20 and medical bills.
Serisously though, he's a great Rooster. But he is a little aggressive towards our daughter and the neighbors don't like his 5am wake up calls. A great Rooster if you need one.
******* Kevin.